Plenipotentiary

January 27, 2010

“Fuck you, asshole!” Sheila screamed.

“You already did, whore,” Jack retorted. “Sorry, I mean ‘slut.’ A whore charges. You give it away like free samples at Costco.”

“Cut, cut!” yelled Greg. “I need more venom from you, Jack, and Sheila, if you could tone it down a bit that would be great.”

The two actors stared at the director in disbelief.

“Fuck you, Greg,” Sheila growled. “Stay out of this.”

“It’s none of your business,” Jack added.

“Really?” Greg asked. “My two principals are fighting in the smallest green room known to man and it’s none of my business? None of my business?”

They both started to speak and Greg silenced them with a gesture.

“I don’t give a shit who fucked who,” Greg said quietly. “I give a shit about the play that is opening tonight, starring you two horny fucks. You are both stellar actors, so fucking act like professionals or we’ll see how much your understudies have been paying attention.”

He turned and stalked out of the room, silence like a thunderclap echoing behind him.

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